I have posted some funny stuff before, but this is really funny.

Ladies we are pleased to announce that we are now open for business in Central Tokyo.

Ever Wanted Your Own Yes Man? Ladies, it is time to stop wasting your valuable time taking English lessons just for the chance of dating the teacher. Set your goals higher! At My Yes Man English Conversation Male Escort service we put the fun back into your conversing and the excitement back into an evening out on the town. Enjoy your free time with one of our handsome, cool Western gentlemen on a dream date of your making. Our exclusive Yes Man will speak English to you while you are enjoying the finer things in life.

Take him anywhere you like, including the movies, dinner or Disneyland. You can even take him home to meet the parents…. Well maybe not the parents but our guys will say, Yes to almost anything. We will send your Yes Man to meet you at a public bar, hotel lobby, famous restaurant or even your favorite coffee shop! You can have your own Yes Man per hour, per day or even over the weekend. You never have to visit our office because we bring our Yes Man directly to you! So begin your Yes Man Adventure today! You should make reservations from 3 hours to 30 days in advance… And let the excitement begin!

女性私達は私達が中央東京のビジネスのために今開いている発表するために喜ぶ。あなた専有物が人はいほしいと思ったか。女性、それは英国のレッスンを取る教師に日付を記入することのチャンスのあなたの貴重な時間をちょうど無駄にすることを止める時間である。あなたの目的をより高く置きなさい! 私の肯定の人の英国の会話のマレの護衛サービスで私達は町で夕方にあなたの話すこと及び興奮に楽しみを入れた。あなたの作成のdream 日付の私達のハンサムで、涼しい西部の紳士の1 人のあなたの自由な時間を楽しみなさい。私達の独占記事のはい人はあなたに生命のより良い事を楽しんでいる間英語を話す。映画、夕食またはDisneyland を含んで彼をどこでもあなたが好む、取りなさい。親に会うために彼に家を取ることができるか。多分井戸はほとんど何でもにない親しかし私達の人、はい言う。公共棒、ホテルのロビー、有名なレストランまたはあなたの好みの喫茶店で会うために私達はあなたの肯定の人を送る! あなた専有物を1 日につき1 時間につき人、はい有するかまたは週末にわたって均等になることができる。私達があなたに私達の肯定の人を直接連れて来るので決して私達のオフィスを訪問しなければならない! そうあなたの肯定の人の冒険を今日始めなさい! 3 時間からadvance?And の30 日に始まるようにした興奮が予約をするべきである!

What is most funny is that these guys want to get paid for what I guarantee they are willing to do for free. :) I wonder how this would go down in Korea? By the way, be sure to click on the link to check out pictures and video clips of the foreign male escorts. Oh yeah, and the machine translation Japanese sucks bad.

Posted by Matt, filed under Funny. Date: July 31, 2007, 9:38 am | 11 Comments »

Stories like this really put things into perspective when it comes to technology and how far behind Australia is. The article says that SMS messages will probably disappear by 2012. SMS messages in Japan were already obsolete in the year 2000 in Japan, completely replaced by email on the mobile phone. I was using it so I know. By 2012 Australia will also have this technology widely available, some 12 years after it was widespread in Japan.

The days of SMS are numbered now that mobile email access is becoming a commodity, research firm Gartner says.

Long the preserve of businessmen in power suits, mobile email is about to hit the masses with one in five email users accessing their accounts wirelessly by 2010, according to Gartner.

Monica Blasso, the firm’s research vice-president, said mobile email had moved beyond the BlackBerry and was increasingly a feature of even low-cost mobile phones, driving consumer adoption.

“By 2012, wireless email products will be fully inter-operable, commoditised and have standard features,” she said. “They will be shipping in larger volumes at greatly reduced prices.”

Today there are less than 20 million wireless email users worldwide, but this will grow to 350 million, or 20 per cent of all email accounts, by 2010, she said.

There is not any really any good reason the this, except that we Australians have a habit of accepting second best, and paying more for it than most any other country, from mobile phones to internet.

Posted by Matt, filed under Technology. Date: July 30, 2007, 7:46 pm | 4 Comments »

Mugabe
President Mugabe working on his project to print more money

With a collapsing economy and an official inflation rate of 4500%, Zimbabwe’s President Mugabe has promised to print more money to pay for government projects.

HARARE, Zimbabwe (AP) — President Robert Mugabe has promised to print more money to fund municipal projects, a government newspaper reported Saturday. The pledge came despite hyperinflation that has created severe shortages of cornmeal, meat, milk and other staples.

Meanwhile, water shortages worsened due to pump breakdowns, and a senior government official said kidney patients were dying for lack of dialysis machines.

The offical Herald newspaper reported that Mugabe told a meeting of local councilors they should put more pressure on government ministers to improve services.

”Where money for projects has not been found, we will print it,” Mugabe was quoted as saying.

The printing of money is generally regarded as a recipe for inflation — which is officially at 4,500 percent in Zimbabwe, though private economists estimate it to be least twice as high. The government last month ordered sweeping price cuts of around 50 percent, accusing store owners and businesses of fueling the inflation.

Zimbabwe is in the grips of its worst crisis since independence from Britain in 1980. Power, water, health and communications systems are collapsing, and there are acute shortages of staple foods and gasoline. Unemployment is around 80 percent, and political unrest is high.

Mugabe blames Western sanctions and rejects criticism that the meltdown is the result of mismanagement and the often-violent seizures of thousands of white-owned farms he ordered beginning in 2000.

The biggest government hospital group acknowledged Friday that 10 of its 18 kidney dialysis machines were awaiting repair and imported spare parts needing scarce hard currency.

Vice President Joyce Mujuru said kidney patients had died for lack of dialysis machines, and lambasted the Ministry of Health and Child Welfare for not fixing the problem.

Mujuru accused officials at one hospital of not installing the machines in the first place, even though she personally requisitioned the equipment from abroad in 2004.

”This is the sort of ineptitude that we have always been complaining about,” she told The Herald.

Lack of hard currency for imports is crippling the health sector.

Pharmacists on Friday advised AIDS patients to stock up on their drugs after local manufacturers warned they would soon run out of imported raw materials. Some 20 percent of Zimbabweans are infected with HIV.

In a sign of other serious problems, water storage drums were sold out Friday in one main Harare hardware store as water shortages worsened. The state water utility said it suffered new breakdowns at its pumping stations.

The government-ordered price controls have denuded stores across the country, with businesses saying they can’t afford to sell at the new prices. Some 5,000 managers and gas station and store owners have been arrested and fined for defying the price controls since the order was issued June 26.

I have a suggestion for the Mugabe government. At this point the paper rolling of the printing presses is worthless, and no one can even use it for anything, much less buy anything. Therefore I suggest the the Mugabe government convert the printing presses from producing notes of hard paper money to rolls (like toilet rolls) of soft paper money. Everyone needs toilet rolls, and it could become a currency that people could trade to each other. Indeed, as people use the toilet paper currency the inflation rate is lowered as money is taken out of the system. I think this is a good idea. At this point the Zimbabwe dollar cannot even be used to wipe your bottom.

Posted by Matt, filed under Scams. Date: July 28, 2007, 9:58 pm | 7 Comments »

A crazy foreign policy that brings chaos and increases the chance of nuclear war? Great, says these “Christians” that want to bring the end of the world about as soon as possible. Very scary.

Rapture Ready: The Unauthorized Christians United for Israel Tour from huffpost and Vimeo.

Posted by Matt, filed under diplomacy, finger chopping wacky. Date: July 28, 2007, 9:42 pm | 8 Comments »

18  Jul
Slow posting

Sorry everyone for the slow posting. I have been incredibly busy at work, busier than I have been in my life, in fact. I will get my stuff in order and return to posting at a normal rate next week. Thanks for reading.

Posted by Matt, filed under Random. Date: July 18, 2007, 5:08 pm | 118 Comments »

What is more, it was the men guarding the bank that pulled off the robbery!

In an astonishing heist, guards at a bank here made off with more than a quarter-billion dollars on Wednesday, according to an official at the Interior Ministry.

The robbery, of $282 million from the Dar Es Salaam bank, a private financial institution, raised more questions than it answered, and officials were tight-lipped about the crime. The local police said two guards engineered the robbery, but an official at the Interior Ministry said three guards were involved.

Both confirmed that the stolen money was in American dollars, not Iraqi dinars. It was unclear why the bank had that much money on hand in dollars, or how the robbers managed to move such a large amount without being detected.

Several officials speculated that the robbers had connections to the militias, because it would be difficult for them to move without being searched through many checkpoints in Baghdad.

Otherwise on Wednesday, there was only scattered violence in the city, although 18 bodies were found by the police in different neighborhoods, signaling that sectarian killing had not ebbed.

Amazing. Surely that is some sort of world record.

Posted by Matt, filed under Scams. Date: July 11, 2007, 9:45 pm | 3 Comments »

11  Jul
Dreamy documentary

A friend of mine has made a documentary about the full sweep of human history, featuring the voice of Carl Sagan. The documentary is dreamy, with a sense of mystery. Sit down with your favorite bottle and watch it all the way through. It is excellent. I watched it as though in a trance.

Please express your appreciation at his blog.

Posted by Matt, filed under Friends. Date: July 11, 2007, 5:16 pm | 3 Comments »

Koreans profess a fear of American beef, yet essentially leave their filthy dog-meat industry unchecked. I wish a week-long case of diarrhea on all the dog-meat lovers in Korea.

Link to Disgusting Video

Link to a More Disgusting Video

Link to Article on How Authorities Turn a Blind Eye to the Industry

Posted by Gerry-Bevers, filed under Uncategorized. Date: July 4, 2007, 6:16 pm | 286 Comments »

The following is a link to a video showing a sheriff’s deputy shooting a man after telling him to get up. The deputy was charged with attempted involuntary manslaughter, but was acquitted in spite of the video. Was justice served?

Link to Video

The following is a link to a another video and an article reporting on the acquittal:

Link to Article

 

Posted by Gerry-Bevers, filed under Uncategorized. Date: July 3, 2007, 3:59 am | 18 Comments »

Looks like the AIDS threat English teacher has been arrested. The article discusses English teachers being arrested for using fake degrees, but does not specify why he has been arrested.

Meanwhile, police have arrested an Australian English instructor who made headlines last month by telling his Korean ex-girlfriend he was infected with the AIDS virus when she broke up with him.

An Australian crime wave in Korea? :) Looking forward to seeing more details on this.

Posted by Matt, filed under Random. Date: July 2, 2007, 10:26 pm | 1 Comment »

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