I am “FamilyGuy”, a commenter on this blog and Australian guy in Sydney. I personally know Matt and have lived with Koreans and have several close Korean friends. I am not anti-Korean in the least as anyone can see from my comments that I have posted these many months.
I regularly organise language exchange events in Sydney just to get people from different backgrounds together for things such as beach trips, BBQ’s etcetera.
The week before last I had organised a dinner. This dinner was to be at a Korean BBQ restaurant in Sydney, and was attended by Australians, Chinese, Korean, Singaporeans and Japanese.
About 16 people attended. Most of the people I had organised via a Language Exchange website. Of the guests one was a Korean girl called “Karen” that I had met on this site. She was in Australia to study English and had only been here a short time and was eager to improve her conversational English and to meet friends that were not Korean.
The dinner I had organised involved lots of different types of Korean BBQ food and drinking of Soju. That night I had spoke only briefly with Karen as she was at the opposite end of the table.
The night was a success but from that day on Karen never replied to my text messages or my phone calls.
Finally late last week, I got a message from her to say “sorry that I had not replied but my Korean boyfriend got very angry a t me and I haven’t been able to use my phone”. I replied to her asking why he had been angry, she said because she came home drunk from the dinner that I had organised and this was shameful to him. She also told me he had hit her a few times and she couldn’t come out because of a black eye. Then what she said next surprised me, she said “anyway it was my fault and I deserved that I shouldn’t have gone out and drank Soju”
I was both shocked and surprised at this attitude but have been told by other Koreans that this is commonplace and she should have known better.
Recently I have not heard from her at all but I bumped into her completely by chance on Friday and she told me she could not talk to me and walked past me. I think her boyfriend told her not to speak or contact me again or he would “get angry again”.
It reminds me of a joke I heard “What does a Korean man say to his girlfriend that has two black eyes?”
“Nothing he already told her twice”.
It just seems to me that Karen only wanted to go out and improve her English ability along with the intention of meeting new friends, but was physically punished by her Korean boyfriend for doing so. This to me is completely unreasonable but it seems to have been a normal reaction by Korean standards.