Occidentalism
Duc, sequere, aut de via decede!

Dragon Wars reviews

September 13th, 2007 . by Gerry-Bevers

In its “Vulture Blog” section, New York Magazine writes a short review of the Dragon War’s trailer, “‘Dragon Wars’ Trailer: Like Michael Bay, But Cheaper!” Here is what was written:

The Tagline: “On September 14, something extraordinary will turn our world into a battlefield.”

The Translation: All expense has been spared to bring you this sci-fi/action hybrid.

The Verdict: You know when you’re at the grocery store, and you’re about to buy some salsa, and your eye wanders from the big names of Pace or Paul Newman’s to the dusty store-brand salsa that costs $1.79 a jar? Well, Dragon Wars looks to be the action-movie equivalent of Safeway Salsa. This Korean import, about mythological dragons on the loose in contemporary L.A., shows in its trailer that it offers everything you might find in, say, a Michael Bay movie, except cheaper.

Where Bay would cast Shia LaBeouf and Anthony Anderson as the hero and his wisecracking black buddy, D-War (as it’s called) stars Roswell‘s Jason Behr and The Office‘s Craig Robinson. Where Bay would spend $100 million on impeccable special effects, D-War seems to have created its dragons and explosions on the director’s kid brother’s laptop. And where Bay would have hired a half-dozen writers to hammer out a laughable, superfluous screenplay, D-War‘s director Hyung-rae Shim does it himself. In a way, D-War is honorable in its total chintziness, but — as with store-brand salsa — we’d be awfully nervous about dipping in.

Here is another article from New York Magazine:

“Dragons in Dunder-Mifflin! Craig Robinson of ‘The Office’ Reveals how Chintzy the ‘Dragon Wars’ Shoot Really Was”

Well, Americans have just one more day to wait to see just how “extraordinary” the movie really is.


8 Responses to “Dragon Wars reviews”

  1. comment number 1 by: GarlicBreath

    about to buy some salsa, and your eye wanders from the big names of Pace or Paul Newman’s to the dusty store-brand salsa that costs $1.79 a jar? Well, Dragon Wars looks to be the action-movie equivalent of Safeway Salsa.

    You went to the market to get some newmans salsa, and you got what you thought was the store brand, but when you go home you opened it and found it was full of catsup with chunks of kimuchi, that smelled like piss.
    .

  2. comment number 2 by: crypticlife

    Well, it’s likely crap — just statistically speaking — but you guys are being really hard on it. Have you even seen it?

  3. comment number 3 by: stumpjumper

    What the….??

    http://movies.yahoo.com/mvc/dfurv?mid=1808746240&iid=7-3106414&s=rc_d&rvid=7-279522&i=0&ys=Vq8_OMl36yYZSW4A6F3_pQ–

  4. comment number 4 by: stumpjumper

    Oh, the link didn’t work…
    Check out Yahoo user reviews of D-war

  5. comment number 5 by: alec931

    Gerry,
    .
    “Well, Americans have just one more day to wait to see just how “exordinary” the movie really is.”
    .
    Eh? exordinary? With all the effort put into this post, why don’t you bother asking another person to proofread your posts??? Or were you just making a wise crack about ‘Konglish’? 😉

  6. comment number 6 by: T_K

    I think it’s a bit petty to get upset over spelling errors.

  7. comment number 7 by: Gerry-Bevers

    Alec,

    Thanks for pointing out my spelling error. It’s fixed now. By the way, keep an eye out because I suspect there will be many more in the future.

  8. comment number 8 by: alec931

    Gerry,
    no prob. Just doing my part to make Occidentalism.org a better place 😉